Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
