I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
