i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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