Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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