yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
