How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
