all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
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