Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Can Purell be used as lube?
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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