i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize
