I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
