With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize