he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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