brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
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