when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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