doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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