More tranny stories later!
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
