if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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