the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
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