I want to walk on stilts...naked
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
