Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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