we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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