the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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