Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
All the doctor said was why
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
