Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
