I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize
