But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize