Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Randomize
