coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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