do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize