I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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