There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
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