How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
