wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
