I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Ketchup is God's man juice
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
