from now on my penis is your penis
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
She even gives head with a lisp.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
