I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
