I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
