Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
