The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
