Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
