i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
