I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
