Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
stop calling my apartment porn island.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
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