Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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