Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
