Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
