Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize