i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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