The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
