I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Randomize